You might have heard about the highly effective product placement strategy that’s cleverly designed to place the ad within a movie or a series to capture the attention of its audience.

Medium is no different; it makes use of the same strategy.

What is unique about Medium, though, is that it promotes itself using its app, and honestly, that’s a brilliant strategy to attract more people.

How Did They Achieve That?

You sign up as a Medium member, and you are intrigued to read articles from ordinary people.

You relate to the writer’s stories, and when you keep following an author, you feel connected to them.

It’s a similar strategy to that any of the social media apps uses. But wait, let’s not jump into comparing Medium to a social media app. Medium isn’t like most other social media apps, and I will explain later why I say that.

Anyway, a lot of people who read are also equally interested in writing. And if you are one of them, you get motivated to give it a try.

You get inspired by other writer’s stories and start penning your views and thoughts on a topic that’s close to your heart.

After a lot of debate, you finally gather the courage to hit Publish. You get a few views and reads, a few claps and comments, and these give you an adrenaline rush (much higher than even your workout routine).

Now you write a few more articles, add a few publications, get curated, and slowly start seeing a few cents. Yes, that’s what you almost always see in your first month, unless you are a published writer already and hiding in your closet.

You do your research on Medium — what exactly this platform is, what works here, how much money writers earn, what writing styles should you adopt, and a million other questions.

Over time, you slowly better your articles. You invest in other apps, such as Grammarly, ConvertKit, MailChimp, your blog site, etc.

And before you even know it, you are officially a part of the ecosystem.

When you create a new social media platform, it’s easy to attract new users but challenging to sustain that. Remember how Google+ and Myspace failed to captivate their audiences.

However, Medium has been steady in attracting new users (mostly readers) who then convert to writers, and the cycle keeps continuing.

It Has Grown Organically

Writers create content and socialize it with their friends and family. They share their articles on various social media platforms, thereby encouraging others to check out Medium.

The Friend Link feature has been very cleverly designed so that an author can share this link with their friends and followers, even if they aren’t subscribing members. Soon, these non-subscribers are intrigued to read more and become subscribers.

Thus Medium’s subscription base grows organically because of the writers who create content and bring more people to their platform.

It is now seeing not only more subscribers but also higher percentage gains every month since early 2018. More than 50,000 writers publish their stories each week.

Medium attracts people from all different streams: professors, politicians, porn stars, students, retirees, veterans, etc. For anyone who has a compelling story to tell and knows how to tell it, Medium helps in delivering their story to the right audience.

While it optimizes its algorithm for engagement, just like any other content generation platform, what sets it apart is the human intervention.

In essence, a small in-house team of curators scours the platform to give the readers a selection of excellent stories customized for them, based on their interests.

However, the economics behind these apps remains the same.

Let’s try to understand what works for Medium and what makes writers and readers stick to it.

It Isn’t Twitter or Instagram

You can share your experiences, life stories, insights and opinions. You aren’t micro-blogging, and you aren’t restricted to 140 characters. It isn’t about the photos either — the images on Medium are just to add colour to the black and white text. Unlike other apps, these photos are mostly stock images. The main focus is on the story that the author wants to convey, nothing else.

Stephanie Georgopoulos, an editor in Medium, when asked for her comments on Medium being called a long-form Twitter, said she doesn’t agree that it’s like Twitter, where people spew venom at the drop of a hat while hiding behind their digital identity.

Writers on Medium are more thought-provoking and insightful.They write stories that you can’t find elsewhere and inspire millions of readers each day.

It Has a Different Revenue Model

Medium doesn’t promote any ads on its platform, which also sets it apart from the mainstream social media, such as Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

The no-nonsense interface and its subscription-based revenue model have helped it grow its subscriber-writer base.

They are similar to some other digital media subscription businesses, like the Time or The New Yorker, or even Spotify and Netflix. They sell content on subscription, however, what distinguishes them is that they rely solely on subscriptions (no advertising).

Most of all, it pays the writers. For every $5-subscription fee they earn from members, they return a part to their writers.

The only other social media site where you can create content and get paid is YouTube.

I have written about my journey on Medium so far, and how I earned my first-ever $826 from a single article. It has further strengthened my belief in the entire system.

Also, they are very transparent when it comes to earnings. They give you insight into who’s earning on Medium, what the maximum potential is for a single article, and what the maximum earning is for that month. Medium publishes these payout numbers to all writers participating in the Medium Partnership program each month.

Conclusion

I am no expert in this field, but from what I have learnt so far, Medium very cleverly uses its subscriber base to grow its business. Offering a level playing field for writers (most of whom are not published authors elsewhere) it has given us a platform to express and earn.

It’s a business model that thrives on a win-win strategy. Everyone gains — readers, writers, editors, publishers, and Medium themselves — by consistently growing and generating quality content. History has shown us that a mutual benefit approach helps to accelerate growth, provide employment, and promote creativity.

By Oct 2019, Medium had paid out more than $6 million total to 30,000 writers. Developing an app that can then self-promote itself through its readers and writers is pretty clever.

Medium’s business model is designed to serve writers and readers. That’s it. For more information, read “How Medium Works With Writers” by Siobhan O’Connor.

Till when will you remain silent?

You get ignored, your arguments not valued,
They say you don’t have much skin in the game
Oh, Kiddo!, You are just an amateur, You have just begun.
They think they are the stalwarts,
They have seen it all and they know it all

Only if their thoughts weren’t so shallow, their values so hollow,
let’s be real — who is the real novice and who the wise, after all!
Your ideas get dismissed no matter how fresh, offbeat or creative,
no doubt they use the same old lens, the same old narrative!

Till when will you remain silent?

Your work gets taken away, tossed and turned, twisted and churned
presented to some old, some new, some fools and some ‘Who are you?’

Some get applauded, some get acclaim, some make me realise what I earned
But some remain as beautiful packs and some give me those Monday blues

Till when will you remain silent?

You get those snarly eye-rolls if you ask too many questions or considered ignorant if you ask too less! When do you stop getting judged?
You get manipulated ever so often you don’t even realise when it started and where it ends, everything is hazy and confusing. Why do I care so much?

Till when will you remain silent?

You struggle to join the dots; you run from pillar to post
You get the back story and make sense of those annoying jargons
Why you’d ask? Because let’s be honest — no one likes easy, no one likes plain
All the more if it’s run by all Jacks and critiqued by a Jane!

Till when will you remain silent?

You still wake up, gather all your might, get your mind right and go through the grind. Day in and day out, months pass by and years follow suit
Year after year- You complain a little, learn a little and grow your kind.

You realise the system is broken and ruthless
You criticise for the better, but you get told ‘Everything’s fine’
You wonder what is ‘truth’ and what ‘lies’ anymore. When they defy logic, miss the obvious, care for none and not a dime.

Not anymore and not for long

Don’t remain silent

Don’t lose that hope and definitely not that intent
The world has just begun and it’s only 2000 years old and we have a billion more to go
Kindle that burning rage and collect all those powerful thoughts — the war has just begun, and there are a million battles to be fought!

The pen is mightier than a sword
Fight with a pen and slay with your word
Just,
Speak up, Speak right and Speak now

Someone at your office has this unusual approach to do things and is your first reaction is that it won’t work? Or consider this – you are on a trip and, everyone else is enjoying, but nothing appeases you – the stay, the itinerary, the rented car or the food.

And a lot of other times it’s not even verbal. For example, you find this close friend who has a newfound hobby in videography – they released their first YouTube video after a lot of research, effort and dedication behind the scenes. You don’t see all that. What you see is the final product – a 5-minute video. And your first reaction is ‘that content is so amateur’ or ‘I could have done that so much better’.

And if I have the liberty to extend this cynical behaviour to a further extent then consider this scenario. Someone gives you excellent feedback for a training that you delivered, and instead of feeling content, you start self-doubting yourself if you truly deserved it. So, in short, you spare no one and not even yourself while criticising.

Let’s understand this behaviour a little more.

Why does this happen?

1) The default lens with which we operate for others is different from the lens we use for ourselves

Let me explain using an example
You visit someone’s place, and it’s a tad bit untidy. You’d be quick to make a judgement of how they live in a complete mess. In reality, it’s just a little unorganised or dusty. However, we are quick to perceive and judge the host in a different light.

What we most often do not acknowledge, is the fact, that they might have had a rough day at work or perhaps they are dealing with some personal issues or maybe they don’t prioritise cleaning over their hobby. We don’t know that, but we judge them.

And the irony is, we might not have been any better, given their situation. Being critical of others’ habits is easier than introspecting our habit of judging others and almost always with different parameters than the criteria we use for ourselves

2) Wearing the ‘black hat’ is our default mode

In one of the training sessions that I attended, we were taught about the six thinking hats for decision-making. Each hat has a different colour, and each colour represent a different characteristic. One of them is a black hat which means you need to critically evaluate an option before you make a decision.

Now, if that’s the default mode that you operate in, you are going to be critical of every new idea and person. And you will always find the glass half empty. It is easier to criticise than to appreciate because we have a confirmation bias – the tendency to interpret new evidence as confirmation of one’s existing beliefs or theories. If you have a preconceived notion about someone, by criticising your strengthen those beliefs further.

3) People are trying hard to look smart

In this digital age, where we have plenty of information or misinformation, there is a view and counterview for anything and everything.

For instance, at a fundamental level, we would all agree that we should fight corruption, reduce pollution levels, enforce stricter laws against rape or save our planet. However, a lot of what is happening around the globe tells us otherwise.

The recent protests by Greta Thunberg – she received overwhelming support on one hand, and also had to face widespread criticism on the other. This accurately portrays our mindset and behaviour – of how we are divided in terms of our opinions and views, on rather black and white topics

‘For every one person saying it’s possible, there are ten others (if not more) who say it isn’t.’

‘NO’ is a powerful word. It immediately grabs attention, puts the other person in a defensive position. And irrespective of the outcome, the rationale or righteousness, the critic now assumes more consideration than the other person. Simply put, it is an easier way to get attention or appear insightful when the reality could be completely different.

Let’s be a bit more appreciative of people around us and especially those who put a conscious effort into creating or building something. Sometimes they succeed and sometimes they fail. They will have their own learning curve – let them find that on their own. They will be kind and considerate when you try something new. And if you could really do much better than them, ask yourself – why aren’t you doing it?

Remember, everyone has ideas, only a few execute and fewer see the goal post. So, be more considerate and less judgemental

Sometimes it’s just the workload be it personally or professionally that doesn’t let you soak in and absorb everything that is happening around you, that leads to overthinking. Whatever be your reason we all as human are wired to worry. But more than the problem I am going to focus on the solution in this article.

Here’s what I do to unwind and calm those nerves.

1. Declutter the space around you, Dust the furniture, vacuum clean and Light a candle

If you are a Marie Kondo fan, you’d already know the benefits of a clean space but if you aren’t then let me explain. A clean and tidy space helps to organise your thoughts as well. A lot of it is to do with what you see and how that makes you feel. So a clean house, organised wardrobes and a spotless place resonate good vibes and positive energy. When you sort your physical surroundings, it helps to focus on what’s on your mind.

2. Listen to some relaxing music

Music is a great stimulant. It helps to focus on the task at hand, and as the music rolls, it helps in thinking straight, decluttering that mind and completely relaxing. There is proven research on this subject that shows a positive correlation between music and concentration – it helps in calming down and getting lost in a different stream of thoughts altogether. So days when you are down, don’t reach out for that bar of chocolate or alcohol, start with some good music to uplift that mood.

4. Take a shower

Steaming hot water helps to relax those tired and sore muscles and rejuvenates the entire body. It is also this time that allows a lot of artists to think of new ideas and also improves focus. Have you ever wondered why? Probably because a lot of your physical activities are restricted – you can’t write, read, listen, talk or do anything except for taking a shower which is a mundane activity wired in your subconscious mind. So that leaves your conscious mind to wander in those gazillion thoughts that you couldn’t focus earlier; this is precisely why meditation helps as well.

4. Dump all those wandering thoughts onto a piece of paper

I am a big fan of diarising your thoughts and writing down your those ideas, emotions, views, opinions and beliefs. It helps to slow down in your thoughts and interpret each word that you pen down.

5. Understand what is bothering you

Dig deeper in your thoughts to understand and break down each of those ideas, decisions or feelings. Try to understand what is causing that stress and what makes you feel overwhelmed. Once you recognise what the issue is, that solves half the problem there itself.

6. Do what brings joy

Today is your day. Allow yourself to do what brings joy – Binge-watch your favourite show, order food from outside, go for a run around the park, just groove to that hip-hop party song, plan your next travel, do whatever makes you feel good. These activities aren’t for the weekend or the future solely. Instead, do it when you are stressed or tired because that’s when it matters the most.

Credit – Joel Valve @Unsplash

7. Focus on one thing in that most urgent /important sort of quadrant

You’ll feel good about having thought through what matters the most to you. Even if you take one step today, you are one less step towards this most significant thing in your life. For me, it is blogging and developing on my writing skills, so when I am overwhelmed, confused and feel pressured, I write to relieve that stress. It helps me feel a sense of accomplishment.

8. Talk to someone on something unrelated

So when I am in this shell thinking (mostly overthinking) about myself and how the world revolves around me. Everyone is conspiring against me or criticising me, or the world is out to get me. But in reality, everyone is living in their shell too. So give yourself some breather and relax, not everything is always about YOU (unless you are Donal Trump or Narendra Modi). Talk to someone on something that is worrying them, and that might make you feel good and come out of this downward spiral of thoughts.

9. Vent it out

Let it out. Breathe. Relax. When you vent it out and tell someone about these gazillion thoughts, it would feel good because it is out of your system. Also sometimes at my workplace, unproductive discussions, directionless initiatives or meaningless outcomes stresses me out; I try to structure my thoughts – understand the problem, what led us to this situation, and discuss it with someone to gain perspective. If nothing at least you have let the steam off of your mind.

10. Exert physical energy

Be it Zumba or boxing or a weight lifting, whatever helps you to exert physical strength is a great stress buster. It is a known fact that it helps to relieve those happy hormones, improves concentration and makes you feel good about your physical self. These are the reasons why I love workouts – a great way to strengthen the mind, muscle and matter – all three.

I am no expert to answer all of those questions but I would like to share my perspective, especially with this plethora of content being generated daily.

So if I have broadly categorised content into two buckets – 1) Entertainment 2) Informational – Even in this category, there are broadly two subcategories – ‘topicalish’ and ‘know-how’ ones. This article dives into this specific category of content which presents a problem and offers a solution sometimes.

The solution is not common or unique to the creator. As a consumer we know that too and might have heard it in some format previously, but what differentiates a creator and consumer is the fact that the former makes a conscious effort to organise their thoughts and observations into a beautiful storyline, rewrites it a million times, proofreads it, edits it, formats it and then publishes it.

So let’s appreciate the fact that content creation isn’t easy. It requires a lot of dedication to let the creative juice flowing in exploring an everyday topic and make it interesting to sell it to the audiences.

However, does that mean the creator knows the solution and has this all-encompassing wisdom to solve all your problems?

Nah! They are just keen to share something that has worked for them, and they believe it might help others. And some of them are sometimes just recycling their old content to keep their numbers up, keep the eyeballs glued to their content and make some income.

As a consumer, it is essential to understand these subtleties to consume responsibly and not believe everything that is being told or rather sold to us.

I consume a lot more content than I create and so I can reasonably distinguish an honest write-up from the mass click-bait production that adds no value to the consumer. They are either repetitive or superlative or overly enthusiastic with seemingly fake energy.

Don’t get me wrong that all content creators are the same, there are quite a few whom I admire, and they inspire me to show up every single day. They are original and have a powerful message to deliver, but not all of them and not always.

And it would be wrong to assume that people who create content would always have the right answer. They might have this one popular blog or vlog or post or story, but that doesn’t mean the rest shall always follow suit. Some are going to be worth your time and some not so much.

In essence, as a consumer of a lot of content and also someone who creates content, here are a few suggestions that I think as a consumer we all should do to uplift the entire cycle of content generation and consumption.

As a consumer, what you should do?

• Like, share and subscribe responsibly. A lot of it is just clutter or ramble. But if you do watch this garbage and share it, that’s more of what we shall get. Understand the difference between good content and great content. And I don’t need to define bad content – that’s easy to understand. But good content is something that has a few good points, is clear and the effort put in by the creator visible. Great content is where you can connect with the creator, understand the sentiment behind the content and resonate with their thoughts. Appreciate when you see a great content – for a vast majority, that’s their source of livelihood and those rare masterpieces are not generated every day. So be a connoisseur of great content. You’ll get more of what you like – it’s the law of nature.
• Be respectful – So coming to the bad content (and there is plenty of that), be respectful when you don’t like something. It’s okay to disagree or write a comment that explains your resentment but be polite and respectful to the creator – It is easy to comment, difficult to create
• Judge the article by the use of its messaging and not by the clickbait headline that made you click in the first place.
• Ever heard of content recycling. Yes, that’s true – Sometimes content creators recycle their content in different packaging, be smart to be able to distinguish that so you don’t prey victim to their strategies.
• And lastly, cut them some slack and don’t believe in everything that someone says because you liked this one article/video/post that they had created. They have their share of ups-and-downs, and probably at times some of their content is going to be shallow and wouldn’t cut the mark.

Happens to me a lot and thought to share the 7 ways that I use to cope with confusion and frustration in the entire decision-making process.

I have spent a lot of time struggling to make simple decisions – ‘Which denim jacket to buy’, ‘What restaurant to go for dinner’, ‘Which hair colour would suit my hair?’ and so on. These are simple everyday decisions, but not being able to make a decision is a genuine problem that I face.

And I think there are others like me who might experience the same. I am not even talking about the right choices, but merely making a choice that you are 80% content with, is sometimes difficult. That last bit that I subtly added in there, that is where the problem lies – ‘being content with’.

If you know about the decision paradox, you’d know that no matter what you select, you’d never be content with your final selection as you’d always experience this feeling of missing of out on the ‘other alternative’ and what if it were better than the choice you made.

However, in the long run, does it even matter? Probably not, what does matter though, is the time that you wasted in making those simple decisions that you could have productively utilised writing a poem, exploring a theatre, reading an article, playing a sport, just anything that you’d want to do.

Everthing you do, has an opportunity cost of time, so choose wisely.

Given this backdrop, I thought why not, just have a simple rulebook, that can guide me to make a better choice and not be burdened by the decision paradox.

So here are my 7 simple ways that have helped me make better decisions faster.

#1. Take the first option you see that fits your criteria almost 70% – 80% and go with it. Easy.

To explain you with my story, just today evening, I decided to have some dumplings for dinner,and as strange as it may sound, I have never had them in a restaurant setting ever and luckily, I found a cosy little place selling handmade dumplings with a decent ambience and pricing – so it just fit my criteria perfectly, and the obvious decision should have been to go there right?

Wrong! Not to me, because something in me told me to explore a bit more, walk down the road a few blocks to see what other options do I have – I couldn’t find anything similar.

Note that now I have a benchmark and everything that I would find I shall start comparing it to this one. More often than not, I’d not be able to find something similar or better (experience says that). The first one is just going to be the best one – there are a lot of psychological reasons to this than factual a) I have now missed the boat – in this case I already walked two blocks and going back was not possible b) there is a confirmation bias that it is better than other options you’d encounter, and is difficult to overcome that in that heat of the moment.

Anyway, now I keep walking towards my second option which I had in mind – just that I didn’t check the directions and then ended in the wrong place – so was a bit frustrated now, and I ended up buying some average Sushi from an ordinary place.

So the lesson learnt is I could have had a good experience eating what I wanted to – dumplings, had I selected the very first option which met most of the criteria.

Also, that would have saved me time and the mental struggle.

#2. Be clear about what you want and stick to it

This one is simple, just don’t juggle too much – it drains your mental energy and leads you to confusion. Keep it clear in your head what you want at a high level – not being too fussy about the details but just knowing the broad headlines of what you want. If you find it difficult, just close your eyes and imagine yourself wearing, buying, staying, playing, just doing that and living it – you’d know what you are expecting and now look around – does the reality match your expectation?

Restricting your choices does wonder for good mental health – instead use that energy on other important things

#3. Decide on how much time you’d like to spend on that activity

Especially when it comes to restaurants and shopping, set a time-limit by which you would decide on something – be it anything, doesn’t matter – the important thing is to decide by then.

Time pressure is an effective tool as it forces us to cut through those million useless thoughts and focus on that one thing that matters and take a call.

For example, for shopping grocery, I will set a time to complete the shopping in under 30 mins, and if I spend more than that, I’d have to cut on the other more important things.

#4. Develop certain principles that can help you navigate through options easily

For example, I have learnt it the hard way that I value quality more than cost. So I will avoid buying from a factory outlet even if it is cheaper. It is cheap for a reason. Another principle is to not buy without trying it or not to rush through purchasing decisions as that can work against you.

These are simple tips that I am sure, even you would have mastered through years of decision making.

It’s estimated that the average adult makes about 35,000 remotely conscious decisions each day

http://science.unctv.org/content/reportersblog/choices

#5. Use a funnel approach

If you have a broad range, select the first category that comes to mind and then try using filters (just like the ones you have on apps) to narrow your search. This approach will allow you to look in the right direction and come to the outcomes faster – we all do this, but sometimes I think we get lost especially in a new environment when presented with a plethora of options which are designed to confuse you in the first place.

#6. Keep it clean and organised

Now that you know what you want, you have narrowed your options and have decided on the criteria; it’s time to be methodical while approaching the problem.

For example, when my husband and I, we were looking for a house on lease, I had created a small note of which locations, what apartments we’d be inspecting, what is the rental, what amenities are available and what the commute time to work would be. And not a mental note but an actual record on my organiser that we share to help understand the details of the developments made on the decision so far.

You don’t have to pressurise your short term memory into remembering all these details later, as you can always revisit the notes, and it also helps you to think clearly. Another similar tool that I use is mind-mapping and I do it the conventional way using a paper and a pen – making connections, understanding the distances, relationships, patterns much better. Try it out if you haven’t done this ever.

#7. Now this one is a classic – Listen to your gut

It’s what everyone’s told you so far, and it’s cliche, but the very fact that it is famous is because it works. And it works, because there is science to it – your subconscious figures out the finer intricacies of the matter that is sometimes invisible to the naked eye. Bizzare right, what your eyes can’t see, your brain can – like it has eyes of its own. It just does the math quickly to know where this would click or not.

Changing behaviour requires changing those deep-rooted beliefs and values which is difficult.

Let’s start with simple ones – for example, you watch those zillion Youtube videos that talks about ‘what you should eat’, ‘how you should sit’, ‘what you should wear’ – you get motivated, you try it out once, you probably try it another time and if you are supercharged the third time over, but you ultimately don’t stick to it.

Do you know why?

Because changing habits isn’t superficial. It is deeper than we could imagine. And no even 21 days philosophy wouldn’t work if we don’t understand the science behind it. Our behaviour is deep-rooted in our values and beliefs. And deep down if we don’t change that, we can’t change our habits permanently. We can’t stick to that routine.

Let me explain it with a few examples

1. You see the video that talks about the benefits of giving up sugar, you are motivated and you do that Monday through to Wednesday but the mid-week urge is now killing you and unless you have a very strong will power you give in to that urge.
2. You see this amazing morning routine by Elon Musk and you want to follow suit. Now this time around you are very committed and you want to stick to it no matter what. You do it for a few weeks and if you are so committed to it, you also compromise the weekend binge. But what happens next? It results in you feeling sluggish on a few mornings. And now you don’t get to have those eggs or avocadoes for breakfast because Elon Musk doesn’t have breakfast, so acidity kicks in and suddenly you drop it the next morning.

Merely mimicking certain habits without imbibing the drivers – the values and the principles behind them is similar to mindlessly aping someone because we like them. And, that is why, change is not sustainable. Because when this newfound habit becomes more of a task that you need to fulfil; the motivation slowly goes down until it completely wears off and you go back to your old habits.

I shall give another personal example and see if you can relate to this – I think I have a decent fashion sense, nothing too jazzy or nothing too out of style, out of fashion. But there are times when I am quite motivated with my Instagram feed or Pinterest handles that I shall buy these extravagant outfits that I wouldn’t have otherwise bought. Also, bear in mind, I am fully convinced then, that I shall wear them and pull it off as well.

However a few days later it was just lying in my wardrobe, a few weeks later it has gone to bottom run of the wardrobe, a few months later, I actually wear it. Hurray! Okay, I wear it just once (because I don’t wish to feel guilty of not even removing the price tag) and that’s it. I never wear it again and it is just rotting there. I am sure you can relate to this, especially if you are a female, you might have experienced this at some point.

Now, the point I didn’t realise was, I have a dressing style – I choose comfort over trend and I love to go basic. A jeans-and-a-tee would top my list always. So when I buy something that doesn’t necessarily be comfortable enough or requires too much effort, I would seldom wear it. So, without even realising – subconsciously I had discarded it right when I bought it.

Now, what is the reason to do this?

“I was trying to copy someone on my Instagram feed but I didn’t realise I wouldn’t be able to copy their persona, their style and their attitude. “

That is simply not me. And no one tells you that. I have watched numerous videos on style, clothing, photography but they don’t stick because they don’t match my personality type. It requires a conscious effort to change behaviours and it doesn’t happen overnight. Even if it does it doesn’t necessarily stick.

Now the same holds good in the previous two examples that I have quoted.

• Giving up sugar because others have been doing it wouldn’t be sustainable.
• Giving it up because you read about it and just want to try it out wouldn’t be sustainable either.
• Giving it up because you want to prove it to someone is no good either

So what would?

Any change requires you to change your fundamental beliefs and values. It isn’t easy and it won’t happen unless you are consistent about it. Changing too many things will wear you out. Trying a Keto or Atkins is doable once but the more sustainable alternative is to change your food habits gradually. Take smaller portions, include more fibre, have more probiotics and similar such things.

Small incremental changes are doable and sustainable.

To help give you perspective, think about your childhood and now the adult life you are leading currently – have things changed? I bet they have changed dramatically, but it happened over so many years you didn’t realise that your personality was changing every day. So create a goal and make smaller changes – take one step at a time.

And if you don’t find merit in changing things, that’s alright too. You don’t necessarily have to change your habits, sometimes you just need to change your outlook or perspective towards it. And that would strengthen your beliefs and values and define your personality – what matters to you, what gives you peace of mind, what makes you jump out of bed in the morning?

Even one small change each day would mean approximately 25-30 changes in a month

1.Coffee
I love the caffeine addiction like million others because it literally wakes me up. So I normally take my morning cuppa coffee almost 2-3 hours after I have woken up, and trust me this period is the most dreaded part of my entire routine. I dread it because I feel as though I am a zombie that is just physiologically performing, but for all other reasons, I am quite dead. And seriously, I would hate it if someone were to schedule an important meeting that requires a lot of thought process.

However, if this same discussion is to happen after that caffeine shot, I am not just ready, I am in fifth gear baby – My thoughts are stimulated and I am ready to solve all problems. Bring it on – Let’s solve world hunger. Now that’s an exaggeration, but you get the drill – the ideas are flowing easily, I am excited about the meeting, asking all the right questions, connecting dots, absorbing the information, actioning my emails. I love it. Sadly this is the coffee speaking and not my coherent self – is that okay? I don’t know but I honestly don’t care either. Coffee is my poison and to hell with all those articles about ‘why coffee is bad for your health’.

What I mean?

Find what stimulates you on a daily basis and use it as your source of motivation – caffeine, sugar or even some wine

Why you should try it?

Everyone needs an instant boost for motivation.

You got to have some vices to be able to have some voices.

Said I

2. Travel
Now what I just described above doesn’t hold good if I am on a vacation mode, because suddenly I have found a new stimulant – the vibe of this new place I am in, the people I would be meeting, the things we would be doing, it’s all exciting in itself and it is stimulating enough to not require a coffee. I wouldn’t mind one but I shall be fine without one. Also, the brain is very aware of the new surroundings and absorbs a lot more information than in the normal course of the day. The newness of the travel triggers a lot of thoughts and ideas which are so different and unique – it just opens up a whole new realm of possibilities. But travelling is an expensive affair to get that dose of motivation. So, what is the other alternative? The idea lies in the reason itself.

What I mean?

Find one new thing in your day – take an unfamiliar route to commute, a new grocery shop, ditch Netflix for a book, try a different recipe to experiment, a phone call to an old friend, anything. The only thing you’ll have to be mindful of is not to overdo it. Keep it consistent – one new thing, each day.

Why you should try it?

Small changes, doesn’t take much effort but doing it consistently would make a big difference over a period of time.

3. Fear
I think this might hold good for everyone but the reason it features in my list is that I have a really low attention span. I can transcend into several different spaces at the same time while still listening to you in that very moment. A bewildering mind is more focussed on the environment that instigates fear than otherwise. What I want to say is the fear of the unknown, fear of uncertainty or fear of misjudgement all lead to a heightened awareness in that situation. For e.g., if you are giving a speech and you fear you will be judged for your opinions, your awareness levels hit the ceiling. Again fear is just one of the many emotions that acts as a powerful stimulant for activating those brain muscles – there is anger, trust, disgust that all stimulate thoughts. But fear is powerful because of the chemical reactions that take place in your body causing a fight or flight response. It is amazing how the brain could process these million thoughts in a few seconds and decide on what to do.

What I mean?

Find your real fears and I am not talking about the fear of enclosed spaces or reptiles and ghosts. I am talking about those bigger things that would keep you awake at night – unaccomplished goals, directionless career, failed relationships, mid-life crises, mental health issues and use them as motivation techniques.

Why you should try it?

Fear is a powerful stimulant if you use it the right way. The zeal to fix what is broken will help to steer life forward.

4. Workout
You might know that workout is an excellent stimulant because of the endorphins that it releases and that sets you up for the rest of the day; it charges you naturally and is an excellent way to be physically and mentally active. Now that isn’t anything new but what I want to mention is knowing the optimum level where this happens is important. To explain it better, I usually workout in the evening and I vary the intensity. If it has been a moderate routine I would be energetic enough to complete my daily chores faster and sleep better. However there is a catch, if I were to up a notch and do a hardcore workout, I would be flat out or my endorphins would touch the ceiling and keep me awake the whole night. So yes, the lesson is ‘do not overdo it’.

What I mean?

Simply put, workout in any format you like – sport, dance, gym, swim, walk, run or crawl – but move your body and do it consistently. Trust me that consistency is the most difficult part, so embed it in your daily chores.

Why you should try it?

It helps you physically and mentally. Physical fitness helps in better stamina and those endorphins, my, they are an addiction too. You’d understand if you have experienced it.

5. Intellectual conversations
Oh yes, it is such a rarity these days and especially in certain social circles. We have become so superficial and seldom talk about those real issues or be vulnerable enough to share our deepest worries and fears. Those long meaningful conversations with friends, the healthy debates on the economy or politics of your country (and I don’t mean the rant or poison we spew on social media), the life stories of how far we have come and where we want to go. These are the moments which are so rare these days that if you experience them, you should treasure them because they stimulate the thoughts that matter – not just on social media but in real life and also because they impact the circle of close friends and family.

What I mean?

Have real conversations instead of those superficial ice-breaker talks. Listen. Listen to what the other person has to say and respond with an open mind.

Why you should try it?

There is nothing else that would stimulate your thought better than this one. We as human beings are social animals and thrive on what people around us have to say, do, wear and these conversations give us plenty of insights into their world.

6. A powerful message
Be it a wonderful series such as ‘When They See Us‘ or ‘OJ Simpson vs The Public’ or an interview by Michelle Obama or a Ted Talk by someone who talks out of their experience and knowledge it stimulates a lot of thoughts. This is the work that is presented in 1 or 2 hours but it takes a lot of years hard work to create the art that inspires. So a powerful dose of someone’s life experiences is a great stimulant, especially when you can’t live each and every life – you see, you learn and you grow from what others have to teach you. On a lighter note, every-time I see something brilliant I would want to pursue that profession. Not just the fancy ones even something as bizarre as a busker or a boxing professional.

What I mean?

Make wise choices when it comes to the content you consume – Don’t fall for the clickbait content, instead select something more meaningful that you can draw inspiration from.

Why you should try it?

You probably do and so this one is a no-brainer why you should watch healthy inspirational content. Luckily we don’t have to find it in the documentaries or art films anymore, it has become more of mainstream commercial content these days.

7. Do nothing When I have a lot going on, doing nothing helps to compartmentalise those thoughts, to think clearly and stay focused. And I wouldn’t let social media or Netflix or calls or anything for that matter ruin that space and time – because as someone who loves to write this time is precious for me to think about what I want to convey in my writing.

What I mean?

I mean – spend at least 10 minutes in the day by doing nothing. Absolutely nothing. I am not sure if it is meditation, I am no expert in that field, but just start by staring the ceiling, what say?

Why you should try it?

Yes, when you do nothing sometimes you are doing a lot more. By giving yourself time to process everything that is happening around you you get rejuvenated. And I am not saying to fall asleep. I am saying to be conscious of your thoughts

It’s your day, your thoughts and your actions!

Now I do as I preach or rather preach only what I really believe in. So I took a day out of my weekend, which normally constitutes cleaning, grocery shopping, cooking, Netflix and meeting friends. It bore me, this routine. I just don’t enjoy going in cycles day in and day out. I want to break free. Haha – seems like I am singing right now. Oh, yes! I am, Lyrics are the best source of inspiration. They sum up your thoughts and feelings in this lyrical composition that sticks so much better than any writer can ever connect with you. ‘I want to break free’. Anyway, so I stepped out and did what I always wanted to – write, read, listen, and just enjoy life my way. Here is what I did:

So Melbourne has this ‘Emerging writer’s festival’ every year around June wherein they have various events, conferences, workshops around story telling, writing professionally and publishing/editing – so I attended to one of these sessions and get some insights from some published writers. The topic was 5*5 rules of writing. Now I am no professional writer and don’t know if I want to take it up as a profession, however I want to hone some writing skills for my blogs and what better way than to learn it directly from some of finest published writers to kick-start my journey as a writer. I shall write a separate piece on all that I learnt from this session in another article. But in a nutshell that’s how I started my morning, with some inspiration!

“You don’t need to know everything in the beginning, you just need to start”

– Toni Jordan

After some food for thought it was time to fuel the belly, so I headed to this nearby cafe and can definitely vouch for their coffee. One thing I have learnt while choosing a cafe/restaurant is that choose a cafe with ratings of 4 and above for a satisfactory experience. You will cherish the food, service, and ambience of that place and shall set the ball rolling for the rest of your day. So that was the next 45 minutes of me time or rather tummy time.

Now , it was the time to find a place where I can peacefully write with no distractions and whilst I would have loved any outdoor setting – it was not possible in this cold dreary winter days when the temperature drops to a single digit. So I thought what better place than a library. 

So I come to this library, a masterpiece in architecture and find my hideout place. Meanwhile I was thinking, when you have access to such facilities, why not take full advantage of it? So, I got my setting that I had needed – a place full of books, young and bright minds, quiet environment (not that quiet actually with all the visitors, but still better than most public places) – now is the time to begin the work

I started with writing some of my unfinished articles, planned for the forthcoming weekends, thought through some bigger agendas and spent some time reading this book that I had picked up from my office library and had never opened it till then – remember my habit to procrastinate and how I am trying to break through that habit – will write a follow up on that as well in terms of how I have fared so far, some common pitfalls, techniques to overcome them, etc. Anyway, by now I had almost spent 5-6 hours on this. Trust me the focus that I had was unparalleled. I would never have been able to achieve so much in probably next 2-3 weekends because of all the distractions and inexplicable black holes of time.

Anyway now that I had done most of what I had set out to do, it was time to return home. Now I had not planned for this, but when I stepped out of the Library, I saw these bunch of Sudanese students protesting for democracy and I loved the energy they had, the cause for which they were protesting – close to my heart and the leader who gave the speech had a sense of confidence that gathered a large crowd that you can see in the below picture. It left me with a smile.

The rest of my away day was just usual, spent time with my husband watching something over dinner and discussing our day. But this to me was a perfect day – doing the only thing that matters the most to you.

You are constantly thinking of how to do things better, be it at work or in personal life. How could you have done that project differently if you were to do it all over again? How could you probably improve this recipe a little better the next time? How could you shop more productively? Does it sound familiar?

Read the below checklist and tick against the ones you think applies to you. 

1. You watch the ‘Brightside‘ videos more often than the music videos
2. You read articles on ‘Medium‘ over browsing on Instagram
3. You learn from everyone around you irrespective of their age, caste, sex, experience, education
4. You try to find positivity even in the darkest places.
5. You beat yourself to death if you do the same mistake twice.
6. You crave criticism like pregnant women crave chocolate and you find feedback as a blessing in disguise.
7. You constantly improvise, that’s the only way to get better at a skill right!
8. You practice what you preach. It’s a sin to say something that you wouldn’t do yourself.
9. You hate it when people use jazz that they are not even aware of.
10. You feel suffocated if you find yourself in an unproductive session or a directionless discussion.

Now if you answered ‘Yes’ at-least 7 out of 10 times, you are a self-development junkie. If you answered ‘Yes’ in over 5 instances but less than 7 you are not a junkie yet, you are content with your self and less worrisome with what others have think about you. If you got a score of less than 5, you enjoy life on your terms and you probably don’t care what the world around you does and probably are in self-denial. Not always but might apply to a few.

This was just a fun way of probably knowing oneself better, and the above indicators are by no means any signs of telling you to follow this or not. That is totally up to you and no one else can/should dictate those terms to you. If you are content with who you are, that’s probably the best for you and need not always look for improvement.